"Roger, go at throttle up." -from the space shuttle Jan. 1986
It's dark here.
Do you ever feel like you're playing a Chinese finger puzzle with your entire body?
Have you ever wondered where the person you are went?
...and who left this lame emo kid in your place?
Essentially I don't feel like anyone knows me.
But those who think they do seem to have "closed the book" on who I am and have no interest in learning more.
It's a lot easier to base conclusions on things past then to hear what I'm saying in the moment.
I get it.
But it feels like the worst insult ever. Like, if you could emasculate a person form the inside out.
To the bone.
Trouble is, true change is born out of revolution.
True revolution is born out camaraderie.
camaraderie is about sharing.
...and it's very dark in here.
I suppose that I am tired of being the person that cares more.
I guess I'm tired of being the one who tries too hard.
I'm tired of feeling hopeful.
I'm just tired.
I don't know how to be the me I've known my whole life...and the me that shows is a douche
...while the people whom I hold dear are done with me.
Motherfucker.
